What is the difference between a lion and a tiger? A lion ,on average, weighs 31 kilograms more.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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What's living, purple, yellow, and green? Nothing.

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What did the joke say to the antijoke? Nothing.

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obama

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what do you get if you cross the mafia and the yakuza? a hefty bounty on your head

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what did the kid with no legs gat for her birthday? A soccer ball! I feel bad for this young girl.

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What sound does a baby in a blender make? I don't know, I was too busy masturbating.

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what do u call blue fluff? blue fluff

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How do you kill a black man? You cn coz he'll beat you up first

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What's the difference between camping and molestation? I wasn't taken camping as a child

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How do you kill a dead baby? You can't, it's already dead.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? You set her alarm clock for a reasonable hour.

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Im about to rewrite History....... History

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justin bieber: ask me if im a boy are you a boy? no.

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What did the chocolate milk say? Yoo-hoo.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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What's black and white and nailed to the floor? A skunk that's nailed to the floor.

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Why did the cookie die Because a fat kid was hungry

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Two straight men walk into a gay bar and promptly forget why they went to a gay bar when they are both clearly heterosexual.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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What do you call a black priest? HOLY SHIT!!!!

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Why did the male propagate the female? Because he was drugged. Slyly, this foxy female had slipped the male the date rape drug and a dangerous amount of viagra. During intercourse, the male ripped a gaping hole in the female's stomach and killed her. He woke up confused inside a dead stinking corpse.

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What did the father tell his son who was caught stealing from the teacher? --The father didn't say anything because he walked out on his family when the children were born.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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