A talent agency is giving auditions and is just about to rap it up when a family shows up. They reluctantly agree to their "brief" audition given that they had found no suitable talent that day. The routine starts with the father starting 6 chainsaws at once while simultaneously starting a juggling/lumberjacking routine. His beautiful wife proceeds to toss him additional chainsaws (as he continually throws them for dramatic effect) while also maintaining a hypnotizing dance which seems to drain your desire to leave from your very soul. The children take turns jumping in between the chainsaws while doing a silent replay of the movie, "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon." After it plays out the father tosses the final chainsaw up in the air which lands standing straight, quivering in the dust of the studio. The studio manager says, "Why that's an AMAZING act!! I'll sign you right now! What do you call your act?" In response to which, the father ****s on his desk.

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Two chemists walk into a bar. The first one says "I'll have some H20." The second one says "why did you come to the bar if you're just going to have water?" and orders a beer.

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Roses are red Violets are blue If i gave a rats ass I'd worry about you

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How many dead babies can you fit inside Casey Anthony's trunk? Trick question. She didn't do it.

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Q: Why don't black people like My Chemical Romance? A: Actually, some of them do.

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

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Three construction workers are high up on a building when they decide to take their lunch break there. The three open their respective lunches, converse pleasantly, and enjoy the fine weather.

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You all have Aids

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-On a scale of one to ten, what's your favourite colour of the alphabet? -The answer is yes, because aliens don't wear hats.

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''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''

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Why did Jerry Sandusky appeal his conviction? Because the judge wrongly considered inadmissible evidence.

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hi anti joke

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What would Loiter Squad be if the characters were white? A show.

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I live in a very rural area, so it's not easy to just go to the store and pick something up. I try to find out how to do things with the stuff I have on hand, so I Googled spot remover, but there are only pictures of stain cleaners. Please help. Spot has rabies.

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I have an erection My mom!

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I used to be an adventurer, but then I decided to retire.

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Who was sorry when the fat kid fell over last year? The whole of Japan.

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Polly went out for a fag. Then she was raped.

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ME NAME IS JEFF

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why do black people have dark skin? because they were born that way

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Why did the man slowly cross the road? He had a prosthetic leg.

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An American, Mexican, and Chinese men are each asked to throw something off a cliff that they have too much of. The Chinese threw off rice. The Mexican threw off tacos. And the Americans.. Well.. They threw off the Mexicans.

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how do you make a little boy cry? Kill his parents in front of him .

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream...?? Because he got hit by a white van

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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