What does the funeral director say at a jewish funeral? Ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes...

"My grandmother has AIDS. They are really nice ladies." -joke by comedian Daniel Cupps

Knock knock Who's there? I Love You! -Harrison

Call of Duty is a good game.

What's white and gluey Glue

Jerry: Why arent you talking to me Seth? Seth then explains using sign language that he was born mute and is offended that Jerry keeps forgetting. Then Jerry uses sign language to say" **** off i have alzheimers!"

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay guys house Knock Knock Who's there? The chicken

Why did the chicken smoke weed? Because he was black

a duck wanted grapes. he didnt get any

Does an albino chameleon turn different shades of white?

What did the boy eat for lunch? - His mother.

How did the fat man survive the plane crash? He didn't, he died like everyone else!

roses are red vilots are blue in soviot russa poem read you.

Did you hear about the circus fire? Yes, apparently there were no casualties but all their props and equipment were destroyed, which will set the company back financially, even with the insurance.

What did the homicidal maniac say to his 13th victim? Nothing, she was dead at the time.

why did the little girl drown? because she was left unsupervized and had never properly learned to swim. she also had no arms and cancer.

What is black, white and red all over? Something that pertains those characteristics

What is orange and annoying? A purple potato.

what did the indians give the pilgrims? syphylis

A bear walks into a bar, and says "I'd like a gin... and tonic." The bartender says "AAAAHHH! A BEAR!!!" and calls animal control. Later after the beast has been tranquilized and carted away, he rationalizes having heard the bear speak as trauma-induced hallucination.

Not at all Nero, if humanity itself where better, you would never have had that pain you rather than carry seems to be stuck to you, what you call your armor, sounds more like a cage to me, it is no wonder that you lose faith in those that drag you down while you find peace and hope within yourself by helping them. I believe you got every right to lose hope in humanity at times, in my eyes you have always been much greater than them, you just seem to believe that if you fail at helping others, then you have failed yourself, remember that there are too many people that surrender in this world, that do not want to be helped back on their own feet rather than to be "shown the only way", you said it yourself, monkey see, monkey do is easy, too easy, and you never take the easy way. I am sorry if I copy your methods too much, it might seem to others as if you are chatting with yourself, which is just crazy, insane. silly, lets just say again that you just got a admirer in me, it cant be helped. Does this bother you?

What did the hispanic say to the black guy? I'm not sure. I wasn't listening because eavesdropping is rude.

Bitch your as two-faced as Doduo

What did the homeless man get for christmas eve? Hypothermia. What did the children get for christmas day? A traumatic experience when they tripped over his snow-covered corpse.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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