The Pope walks into a bar, the barman says: "What'll it be, Pope?" But the Pope's knowledge of English is tenuous at best. He mumbles something in Latin that the barman doesn't understand. The Pope becomes frustrated and leaves.

Guess what? Bananas

Where's my tractor?

a duck, a mexican, a camel, a jew, a duck, a moose, an asian, an ostrich, a turtle, an elephant, a scorpion, two vampires, a pokemon, your mom, Stephen Hawkings, a bird, a plane, mario, your family, and a plumber walk into a bar. They have cancer, AIDS, disabilties, diabetes, herpes, siezures, retardation, death in their families, drug addiction, no arms or legs, no home, no money, racial segregation, and have been raped. A combination of which is worse than the holocaust and three bee stings and a rope that fails.

If you are stranded on a deserted island would you eat your hand or the 5 star meal you butter prepared? -Matt

Who has a higher pitched voice than the average man? A woman.

What's worse than a truck full of dead babies? Trying to sell a used truck with dead baby stains all over it.

Roses are Red Violets are Purple But nothing rhymes with purple.

If you spill milk Don't cry over it..... Clean it up.

Roses are red, Because they can intrinsically change color through natural dyes.

A black man has just died on your porch. What do you do? Immediately call for medical assistance and perform CPR.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

Two cows are in a field. Suddenly, from behind a bush, a rabbit leaps out and runs away. Martin was a lonely man

What's it called when an abusive alcoholic father iguana has trouble connecting with his wayward teenage drug addict son iguana, while at the same time the mother iguana doesn't come home till late hours and constantly calls her daughter iguana a slut? Reptile Dysfunction.

Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

Hi Mum!!!!!!!!

why did the Asian by a dog because he was lonely

What if there were no hypothetical questions?

A dirty joke Three white horse's are walking down a trail one falls in the mud

What do you call a black man with pantyhose on his head. A white guy in the dark with black pantyhose on his head

Bob: Whats the difference between a fish and a microwave? Steve: I don't know Bob: Daaaamn your dumb!

Roses are red, The grass is greener, Every time i'm with you, I touch my wiener.

Knock Knock Whos there? Me. I am a psycopathic heroin addict, and i came to your house to violently rape you and kill your whole family. I dont have a family. Oh.

So I says to the guy "take the money and run." He then takes my money and walks down the street.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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