A young man walks up and sits down at the bar. "What can I get you?" asks the bartender. "I want six shots of whisky," responds the young man. "Six shots? What’s the occasion?" asks the barman. "My first blowjob." "Well, in that case, let me give you a seventh on the house." To which the young man replies, "No offence sir, but if six shots won't get rid of the taste, nothing will."

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A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Tie her down and plant a bamboo seed under her.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He had to get to the other side.

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Whats worse than sourcraut? Casey Anthony.

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Yo momma so stupid, she had you.

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a seal walks into a club.

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Wanna hear the most repeated joke on anti jokes? Why did [insert name here] fall off the swing? Because he/she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not [insert name here].

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What's fun and challenging? Writing an anti-joke.

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what the difference between ET and polish people? ET is an alien and polish people are human

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Dick Cheney That's the joke

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What do you say to an over weight Jewish mother? "Work on those crunches" He was her coach.

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-Knock-knock. -Who's there? -Interrupting Doctor. -Interrup.. -You have cancer.

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What is the #1 cause of pedophiles? Sexy children

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Why wasn't Jesus born in Poland? Because if he's an actual historical figure he would have been born in modern day Palestine.

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Women's Rights

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A dog run after a squirrel. the pursuit didn't last long the squirrel climb a tree.

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I love pissing people off :P

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How do a jew, an African, and u white man stop a train? They pull the breaks

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Why was the girl crying? DEEZ NUTS!

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I used to be an adventurer, but then I decided to retire.

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What is big and wet and smells like mushrooms? A big wet mushroom.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the gas man, I've come to read your meter, like we arranged.

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What's the difference between a fat boy and a thin boy? Fizzy drinks!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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