Knock Knock. Who'se there? It's Dave. Dave who? Um, you invited me over here. Open the damn door.

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if life hands u melons, make melonade.

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My next door neighbour found out yesterday that I am a serial killer. Knock Knock. [L]

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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How do you kill a blonde? There are a variety of methods, but I prefer a fine mix of insecure clowns and pepto-bismol.

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how do you scare a deaf person? you yawn

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What happens when you roll a quarter down the street in Mexico? It rolls for a small period of time but eventually it falls over and stops rolling because quarters aren't able to roll very far on imperfect surfaces.

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So a man walks into a bar. Well, he trips over it because it was very low to the ground and he didn't see it.

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what did the women with no arms and legs say to her daughter? go to your room.

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Q: What's the hardest part about throwing a baby down the stairs? A: My dick.

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why is six afraid of seven? because six is a rapist

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Knock knock whose there nobody you have no friends remember

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Knock knock who's there? Boo. Boo who? Uh, Boo Johnson, your next door neighbor. Forget it I'll come another day.

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Why did the gay kid drop his ice cream Because he got punched in the face.

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What noise annoys a noisy oyster? Hispanics with their loud car stereos.

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Can a nine iron? No, but a tucan.

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Huh, I never succeeded in any of those, and I tried a lot. Please tell me you never gone with something nasty like that...

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Jayden Eccles

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The Kidder vs Bratman, not featuring Robbing the gay wonder: "MUHAHAhAha Bratman if you get me ill kill myself!" HOHOHOHO. "Uh okay" "I totally will!" "Go ahead" "I promise!" Bratman kills the Kidder as a favor, and no crime runs around Goodham city ever the end. Moral: Totally original nothing stolen from Joker and the Batman.

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Fine, just remember that I want to help you, but you cannot ask me for help, and then throw a shitstorm of accusations at me, I have never worked for the feds and never will, I know nothing about their code of operations nor... Anything really. Let me give you an advice, I know that at least two people you trusted deeply betrayed you, but if you are not going to trust anyone again, then leave point zero while you still can do so alive. And no babe, this is not a threat, its advice.

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Knock knock. Who's there?

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Why did the black man run when he heard police sirens? Because he was parked in a handicap spot

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your doctor, You've been diagnosed with venereal disease.

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A man walks into a bar, he is then escorted to the hospital as a result of brain trauma.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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