What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did Elliot Spitzer cross the road? To go have sex with a hooker.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why did the homeless man die? because everyone does.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

School

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why didn't the scientist discover a cure for apathy? He simply lost interest in it.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A- a tv

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A blonde walks into a bar a uses the restroom. She needed to pee.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why couldnt the old man ski? There was no snow.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

whats funny? this joke. just kidding. your face.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q) A black man and a white man are playing a basketball game, who will win? A) The one who scores the most points.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

your mums so fat! "last time i heard that i fell of my dinosaur!!" Oh man are you ok?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

So I'm at the office and I tell this guy, "Hey can you pass me the stapler. But when you pass it over, make sure there are staples in it 'cause if not, I can't staple anything."

thumb_up thumb_down +13

give me a thumbs up

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did Batman say to Robin just before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q. what did the kid say to his foreign language teacher about the test? A: i dont understand this test, its like in a complete different language

thumb_up thumb_down +13

You will never see the a heaven made of pure light with no room for darkness to dwell? Pure light will make you blind, living forever in darkness.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Why are VIOLETS blue?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's black, white, and can't turn around in a phone booth? A nun with a javelin through her chest.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

when life gives you skittles you take a handful and throw it at someone face and yell taste the rainbow

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A black man, a white man and an asian man jump off a building, which one will land first? Due to the equivalence principle, they will all land at the same time.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what do you call a blonde who can't drive? a poor driver

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the collage professor say to the plumber? Hi.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops