What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A. Treadmil

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What do you call a Mexican in a suit? Another Drug lord What do you call a black guy in a suit? Guilty. What do you call a white guy in a suit? The black guys lawyer What do you call a woman in a suit? You don't call her anything as you wonder why she isnt in the kitchen. What do you call a women outside a kitchen? Useless. -Jordan.M

thumb_up thumb_down -18

If Life Throws You Melons, Then You're Probably Dyslexic. -S.H.A.T Brother 2Flush

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Hey Jake can I use your lawnmower? Why Michael, so you can run over my cat like you did last night

thumb_up thumb_down -20

How do u kill a mocking bird? Stab it

thumb_up thumb_down -20

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Leslie's husband admitted to being gay, which came to the surprise of no one, seeing as Leslie is a man.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the girl say in her French lesson? Miss, I don't get it, its in a different language.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

why did jimmy stop eating his breakfast two Penn state officials knocked at the door

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Vancouver Canucks Hater: What time is? Another Vancouver Canucks Hater: 6 past Luongo

thumb_up thumb_down -20

2 Priests and a Monk walk into a bar, All 3 were stabbed to death in a bar fight.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did a 36 year old Asian man stop in the middle of raping someone A: He realized that what he was doing was immoral and that it could scar someone for the rest of there lives and that he could serve a sentence of up to 35 years which would mean he would miss out on the special offers that QVC has to offer during this time

thumb_up thumb_down -20

how do you confuse a blond? put them in a circle room and tell them to sit in the corner

thumb_up thumb_down -20

I donated to Kony 2012. Litterally to Kony. I approve of his actions.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the batmobile lose a wheel? The joker was raping robin too hard

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's the difference between a mac and a pc? Well haven't you seen the commercials.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Jamie stegman liked doodle alot. Yummy he thought to himself as it entered his mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why didn't children go to their grandma at summer? Cause, they were hit by a car earlier that year and they are dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

The awkward moment when you have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Roses are red violets are blue, I more do like pink like the holes are in you.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

I created darkness. God created the stars. God created the bee. I created the wasp. God created the child. I banged your mother. Moral: Soon my wings of darkness shall destroy your very own star, these words seem empty now, so I will fill them with true meaning and purpose as I will give the same to you the day the sky brightens no more.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A man walks into a bar. He drinks.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A mother is sitting with her son at the park. A nearby man suddenly breaks into uncontrollable coughing. The mother leans over to her son and whispers, 'Smoker's cough.' The son never takes up smoking.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops