why did the squirrel cross the road? -because it was stapled to the chicken.

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Q: what's better than ice cream A: not having aids

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So, what happens when Germany attacks France? France proceeds to slaughter the attackers mercilessly, as it was during the Feudal Ages, a time when France was Europe's superpower.

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Womens rights

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A blind man walks into a bar. Nobody is surprised.

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What do you call a person with no arms? Armless.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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I used to tell people: step on my foot on purpose and ill FUCKlNG BREAK YOURS! Then I Evolved.. friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: Thumb me down or step on my foot if only on mistake, and I will break off both your legs and ram them up your ASS!

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How do you hurt a clown? shoot it.

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Why did Devon move out of his mom's house? His mom beats him.

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What's the similarities between a spoon and a duck. Both are not a lamp

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know whats funnier than 24? 25.

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A man walks into a bar. He's black. Its 1962. He is immediately arrested.

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Why was the girl crying? She had just been severely raped.

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What is the difference between a rock and a pencil? Your Mom.

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I hate cripple jokes! I just can't stand them!

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I once duped this chick with a parrot. Crazy thing wouldn't shut up. The parrot was pretty cool

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What do you call a mexican with a broom in his hand? a man who likes to keep his office at his own company clean

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Whats slippery and wet? A wet slipper.

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A squirrel and an owl are sitting in a tree. The squirrel turns to the owl and says nothing, because it is a squirrel and squirrels can't talk. The owl turns to the squirrel and eats it, because it is a bird of prey.

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Why did the horse say moo? Because it's a cow

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So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

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"Want to hear something ironic?" ...he said to the deaf man.

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Roses are red, violets are red, Tulips are red, bushes are red.... WTF MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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