What's worse than a worm in your holocaust? An apple.

What's the hardest part of rollerblading? Telling your dad you're gay.

Doctor! Doctor! There is a fly in my soup! Moral: Huh?

Why did the chicken invent a memory ereaser machine? So he could erease everyone's memory so they would stop making chicken jokes

What has 4 legs and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you a pool table

A lonely man walks into a Self-Esteem class. He sits alone in the back because of his low self-esteem. Forever alone.

Q: What do a hockey coach and a bar stool have in common? A: because seven ATE nine

What kind of cheese isn't yours Nacho Cheese actually it depends on the type of cheese that you stole due to your kleptomania

If you're having girl problems, I feel bad for you, son... Because I can empathise with you, and it's not a very nice situation to be in. Hope you work it out.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why the fuck he crossed the road, I don't know what he is thinking.

A man on a plane convened his stupid flyer that instead of who in knock-knock jokes it what were, he thought it would funny. Later it really paid off, as they fly very close over water he says "knock knock" "whose there" " Captain Neverlands" "Captain Neverlands wh-...were" "Captain Neverlands IN WATER YOU DUMMY!!!!"

How do you put a giraffe in a refrigerator? You open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door.

What happens when a black man is alone the KKK appears

What did the hispanic say to the black guy? I'm not sure. I wasn't listening because eavesdropping is rude.

What did the little girl with cancer get for Christmas? Chemotherapy.

(SAY KATCHUP AND LICKER AFTER EVERY SENTENCE) FOR BREAKFEAST I HAD (KATCHUP AND LICKER) FOR LUNCH I HAD I SEE MY GIRL FRIEND AT THE MALL SO I (KATCH UP AND LICK HER

Coach: Hey, you missed the team meeting today, but I wanted to let you know we've had a number of changes to the lineup. Player: Really? Who's on first? Coach: That's right. A man with the unlikely name of Mr. Who is on first. We also have Mr. What on second, and Mr. I Don't Know is on third. The rest of the team is the same. Player: Oh. People have weird names now. But I'm sure they're great guys. Thanks for explaining that. Coach: Any time. Don't mention it.

How did the young boy cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

Obama being reelected.

knock knock who's there bob bob who bob marley who else

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One asks the other "Isn't it hot in here?" To which the other replies, "Holy ****, a talking muffin!"

why did the panda and puppy get into a fight? how should i know, you tell me.

Chuck Norris doesnt need air to live, Air needs chuck Norris to live. Actaully that statment is a fallacy because it would be fatal to not breathe

When life gives you carrots, don't make carrot juice, because it's gross.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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