What do you call a black man on a bike? A hard-working individual who found a steady job and earned enough money to buy a bicycle of his own which he rides to and from his job because he is healthy, doesn't like to waste money on gas, and doesn't like the pollution automobiles put into the air. By Darragh Hamilton

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Why did the boy cry when he sat on Santa's lap? Because Santa's boner reminded him of his pedophiliac step-father.

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If you have 24 hours to live what would u choose to do? I would choose to take stander ised testing b/c it feels like it's forever.

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What's big, old, and brown? A tree.

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whats worse than school? Summer school

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Q: why didn't johnny do his homework? A:because johnny is dead

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Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because they taste funny.

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Why was the black man smoking marijuana with his friends? He was at a glaucoma support group meeting.

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Why did the little boy die? He had cancer.

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Why did the black man get drenched by a fire hose because he was on fire

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How do you make a mime talk? There are many ways. I prefer a baseball bat with a nail through it.

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Instructions to make origami. 1.) Staple bagels to face 2.) Ask someone else to do it. 3.) Hang yourself because you are too stupid to figure it out yourself

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Poop

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What did the Asian man say to the African man Ching Chang Chong

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A man and a midget walk into a bar each carrying a suitcase. They were stopping by after work.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, there is no reason for a chicken to need to cross a road.

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how many jews does it take for me to be able to have sex with my cousin's girlfriend? idk, but that's how many I need. actually let me have some extras. couldn't hurt.

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the anti-joke.com joke was just like a normal joke. was the anti-joke punchline effective, artful of funny at all? no. it was a plain statement of some facts without consideration for humor. it gets old after you read like 50 of them. it gets REALLY. F*CKIN. OLD.

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So, there was two successful business men at a social gathering when one leans in to the other to comment, "Hey, that women over there, she looks like your wife!" to which the other one replies, "That is my wife."

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Why did the man cross the street? Because no cars were coming and he wanted to get to the othher side

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What do a baby and a slinky have in common? They both bring a smile to your face when you push then down a flight of stairs.

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If a tree falls in a forest and only one women is there to hear it, does i make a sound? Trick question: there's no forests in kitchens.

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what's a self-driving car 10 years from now? probably just "a car".

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was walking.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops