A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why was the Jamaican man smoking pot? His doctor prescribed it. The man has a serious case of glaucoma.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Roses are red, Violets are microwaves, I have amnesia, Roses are red.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

I Have a Black Friend

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why couldnt the dog bark? The dog didnt exist.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

21

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Whats 2+1? 2.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What's young and not funny? Todays anti-joke writers.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

did you know why people keep saying "you know...you know..." in their conversation? well i don't know

thumb_up thumb_down +39

- I got kicked out of the library today. - why? - because I put the women's rights book in the fiction section

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Yo mamma is so fat She has to wear big pants and is easily fatigued.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Q: Why did the Westboro Baptist Church picket the gay marine’s funeral? A: Homosexuals are a plague sent by Satan to destroy the fabric of America.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

how do you make a door cry? twist its nob

thumb_up thumb_down +37

A blind man walks into a bar. Nobody is surprised.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

So, what happens when Germany attacks France? France proceeds to slaughter the attackers mercilessly, as it was during the Feudal Ages, a time when France was Europe's superpower.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Q: what's better than ice cream A: not having aids

thumb_up thumb_down +37

why did the squirrel cross the road? -because it was stapled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What do you call a person with no arms? Armless.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

I used to tell people: step on my foot on purpose and ill FUCKlNG BREAK YOURS! Then I Evolved.. friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: Thumb me down or step on my foot if only on mistake, and I will break off both your legs and ram them up your ASS!

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What's the similarities between a spoon and a duck. Both are not a lamp

thumb_up thumb_down +35

know whats funnier than 24? 25.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did Devon move out of his mom's house? His mom beats him.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

How do you hurt a clown? shoot it.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops