What starts with an 's' and ends with a 'hit'? Shortly after the war, 4 men went to celebrate at the local bar. They all had a grand time there, when a man in black walked into the bar. The man in black knocks once on the bar. "What do you want?" asked the bartender. The man in black didn't respond. This time, the bartender asked again, only louder. The man in black then turned to his right to face the 4 other men celebrating. The man in black then suddenly pulled out a pistol, and shot the 4th man. He then burst into a sprint and ran out of the bar. "He's hit," the 3rd man shouted, "he's hit!"

What does Santa Claus keep in his gardening shed? Nothing. Santa Claus isn't real.

whats a diffrence between a bench and a black person the bench is a thing a black person is a human being

Why should children always be nice? Because the evil christmas demon KRAMPUS will rip their ears off, put them in a bag and beat them with a stick!

what's the difference between a black man and a bench? the bench is an inanimate object

Two cows in a field one says Moo the other says, Moo

Roses are red, violets are red, Tulips are red, bushes are red.... WTF MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE.

Why did the girl have twins she was raped

Why did the chicken cross the road Time for you to get a watch

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

Whats black and blue and doesnt bruise? a bruise.

Scientific fact: If you took all the veins from your body and laid them end to end, you would die.

What is the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer while the other is just a water melon.

Of course, first door on your left

My grandmother's zodiac sign was cancer, and she was killed by a giant crab.

roses are red yoda is green my lightsaber needs 2 hands if you know what i mean

Why couldn't the Asian man drive very well? He was blind from birth.

Two guys went to a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? "Sure" said the guys. The bartender started telling: Anyway, there was this time two guys at a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? "Sure said the guys" At this point, the bartender started telling: Anyway, there was this time two guys at a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? "Sure said the guys" At this point, the bartender started telling: Anyway, there was this time two guys at a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? "Sure said the guys" At this point, the bartender started telling: Anyway, there was this time two guys at a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? (when you are done start reading from the top again, and don't stop ever)

Two twins are born only a minute apart. There is a mistake at the hospital and they are seperated. Years later they reconnect on Oprah and realize they do not have much in common.

What did the black man say to the mexican? Hello

Guns dont kill people...whoever pulled the trigger kills people

Q. what's red and smells like blue paint A. a dead baby in a trash can beside a foster home

Why can't Helen Keller have sex? She is dead

A man violently rapes a small child. Unfortunately the child has aids and gives them to the man.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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