What did the single woman get for Christmas? Raped.

why did bob fall off the swing Because he got hit by a microwave

What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handlebars...except for the duck

What's the deal with airplane food? I've never tried it. I'm just curious how it was.

Sharing means caring, Caring is socialism

what do a heater and a dead baby have in common? a dead baby is only warm for a small period of time

Why was the Asian guy dumped by his hot girlfriend? Well you know what they say about Asian guys.... They are too dedicated to their schoolwork.

why did bob hit Jim Because bob didn't like Jim

Why did the McCann's parent's leave the window's and doors open? Because Portugal is a very hot climate, And they expected the place they were staying to be safe as lot's of tourist's stay there throughout the year.

whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and the holocaust? A pile of dead babies isn't funny

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 cantaloupe.

How do you confuse a blonde? Wait...what?

Knock Knock. Who's there? Frances. Frances who? Frances Payne.

Two farmers are sitting in a cold field. One asks, "Cold day, isn't it?" The other farmer doesn't respond as he has been frozen to death and because of his death, he is unable to respond.

You know your in Houston when... The highway sign says so.

How did Jane fall off the swing? Jane had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Jane.

Your mom is so stupid she has trouble holding a steady job and struggles to support her family.

A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

How do you change your dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel.

What did one liar say to the other liar? I'm very honest.

"Knock knock." "No."

What happened to thepeanut who went to NYC? He was assulted

Roses are red, violets are blue shut the hell up, and sit the hell down

Whats worse than spilling ketchup on your shirt? Getting hit by a bus

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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