Whats green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a serial rapist.

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What is the oppisite of water? Dry!

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HEY!

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How many turrets patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? Cocksucker!!

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im gay

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What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? He called the police.

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Zafarfanugen the third: Why did the chicken cross the road? Bob: Who cares about some dumb chicken crossing the road! I am more interested in why three generations of your family would continually use such a ridiculous name!

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Why is my room black and white? Because your in a black and white movie.

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i am a slasher, a slasher of prices to get to the other side. poop goo goo gaga

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What do an elephant and a grape have in common? Well, depending on your ideological views they are either both God's creations or two examples of species which have evolved over time. That is all.

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*knock knock* *knock knock * ? ? The man didnt answer because he died of a stroke

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what did the iphone say to the galagy s3? nothing they are phones.

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Q: What did one Christmas ornament say to the other? A: I didn't know they could talk! Get me that ornament so I can chat with him!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Sugar is sweet, And so is she.

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Why did the Black man kill the White man? So he could end up in jail with the rest of his family.

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Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first one says, "Pass the soap." "No soap, radio," replies the second one. "Oh, you want me to turn on the shower radio?" "Yeah, it's too quiet in here. I could use some tunes." The first polar bear turns on the radio. "Now pass me the soap, please," he says. The second bear passes him the soap, he washes his face and neck, and then they both get out and towel off. The second bear switches off the radio before they leave the bathroom.

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what is the difference between jelly and jam? jelly is smoother where jam has chunks of fruit in it...... and i cant jelly my penis down your throat

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What did the kitten say to the ant? Nothing, it was dead. - Driiiftz

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There was once a man with a penis so huge, his girlfriend liked their sexual experiences very much. A year later they got married and had kids, however the man got fired from his accounting job and it all went downhill.

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How do you stop a baby from crawling around in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor.

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Yesterday, my friend said I should facebook him. So I slammed a book into his face.

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If it looks like a chicken and acts like a chicken, its most likely not a deadly crab running towards you with a knife that has rabies and is afraid of towels.

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A blind man watches TV

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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