Someone threw a cigarette at me today... What a fag.

What do a black man and an elephant have in common? They are both multi-cellular organisms, they both belong to the kingdom Animalia, the phylum Chordata, and the class Mammalia, they both possess vertebrae, they both move through legged locomotion, they both possess knee joints and they both possess the capacity for altruistic behavior.

What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things, because a dead baby isn't funny at all.

What's as hard as a rock? A rock

Q: where was Johnny during the bombing? A: everywhere

guest what i love pancakes

John Cena

Chuck norris doesn't make his own butter he roundhouse kicks the cow and the butter comes straight out.

Whats worse then getting AIDS Math class

What's worst then finding an worm in your apple. Finding a colony of flesh eating bugs after you toke a bite.

Why did the boy cry when he got circumcised? Because he couldn't fap.

Why was the plumber sad? Because his family died in a car crash

What did the angry man with tourette syndrome say when he smashed his thumb with a hammer? Ouch.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Q. what sucks A. getting robbed loosing your family and then you die by cancer

Roses are red Violets are blue I've got Alzheimer's Cheese on toast

Why was Dr Who unable to travel back in time using the TARDIS? Because it's just a television prop. It isn't a real time machine.

What's the difference between your mother and a mallard with a cold? One's a sick duck; the other regrets having you as a child.

Why was 7 afraid of 6, because 6 raped 5

A man walks into a bar. He suffers a fatal concussion and the playground is shut down by local police until proper padding is installed.

How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? One.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! :)

What do you call a black man holding a stone with bloody hands A hard working stone mason

Roses are Black, Violets are Black, I am Ray Charles

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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