When A White Man Sees A Magic Trick - He Claps When A Black Man Sees A Magic Trick - He Does Handstands, Celebrations, And Shouts

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Q: What did ine sweaty arab man say to the other sweaty arab man? A: "I'm sweaty"

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Easy, you get a phone with a recorder that rather than playing a "please leave a message after the tone", plays the same tune as if the phone was still not picked up. Now tell me here and now, because I wont waste more time on you, what part did you play in this? Jenny Chatterton? Another one of your pseudonyms? What the fuck did you think would happen? You live in the Uk, london, so, tell me everything, or I will share every single detail here.

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OH LOOK I'M A SAILOR I KNOW NAUTICAL PHRASES! LIKE...... KNOTS AND MAST AND SHIP AND SEA AND STUFF

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A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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Did you hear about the guy with no legs? He had them blown off by a tank shell in Afganistan.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house Knock knock Who's there? The chicken

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Knock knock! Who's there? ADHD ADHD wh-? SQUIRREL!

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how big is a black mans penis? idk ask his wife

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what's worse than me fucking your mom she enjoyed it

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Somebody pushed it.

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What do bicycles and platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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im gey

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What did batman say to robin when they got to their car? Get in the car

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knock knock who's ther? chris chris who? JUST OPEN THE F***ING DOOR AND CHECK IT OUT

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. That is highly improbable, due to the fact he is in a wheelchair.

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Chuck norris doesnt mow his lawn, He calls someone to do it for him and then he pays them a great deal of money considering he has a large lawn.

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A man is walking on the beach and notices a shiny brass lamp on the ground. He picks it up, polishes it and then sells it for a reasonable amount of money at a local pawnbroker.

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What looks like half of an apple? The other half.

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Billy: Why do pirates say rrrrr? Mark: I don't know, I'm not a pirate.

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Did you hear the one about the chicken crossing the road? It wanted to go to the other side.

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A bar walks into a man... Wait, that's impossible.

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Why did the black man get arrested? He didn't pay child support for his 12 bastard children

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I like it it the butt -Tyler James Nehring call me 863-670-1547

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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