So a baby seal walks into a club.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first koala. Why did the man fall of his bike? He was struck with a falling koala. Why did the fish fall of its bike? Because it's a fish. What is fuzzy and might kill you if it falls on you? A pool table.

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What's the biggest difference between the East and West Coast? About 3,000 miles.

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Knock, Knock The door's open

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why, but I was standing on the other side of the road and I took it home and mamed the chicken with a powerdrill.

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17

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I like my coffee like i like my woman, Without a penis.

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WOMENS RIGHTS

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

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Q: What did my uncle Tom say when he first encountered my friend Richard Jefferson? A: Hello

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Oxygen and magnesium are going out OMG Think science the you might get it If not O oxygen mg magnesium

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Knock knock. Who's there? I just ding dong ditched you.

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Cancer victim: What kind of doctor are you? Person 2: I'm not a doctor. In fact, I'm a suicide bomber and am planning to initiate the detonation sequence right now. Cancer victim: Well, it doesn't really matter. No matter who shows up, I'll still die anyways. This way, I'll be able to pay a visit to the transcendent city high in the heavens sooner. Person 2: I bet that many would mourn your death at your remembrance ceremony. Cancer victim: That doesn't bother me. My friends and family are close to my heart, but that doesn't warrant eternal proximity with one another in itself. Person 2: Let's go to a better place. Let us finally break free of our mortal chains that have unceasingly been hindering our progress since the first war took place. Cancer victim: Wait, I've changed my mind! Person 2: Too late. I wish I had a time machine... not.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Hey, where'd my tractor go?

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Three nuns accidentally walked in to a bar and so they immediately went out.

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I just lost the game where if you think about the game then you lose the game. so did you.

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I Wish... I was Charlie Sheen's Dealer

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What did the little crippled boy get for his birthday? He's an orphan so he doesn't know his birthday.

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What happens when you throw a cricket bat at a blonde? She is hurt and reports you to the police for anti-social behaviour.

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Knock knock Who's there? Labrinth Come in

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What did St. Mary Magdalene tell Pontius Pilate during the crucifixion of Christ? All this chaos is making me CROSS-eyed!

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Your landlord. I'm here to collect rent

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What's worse than one bee sting? 2 bee stings

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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