Why couldn't the dog fetch? It's back legs were useless after it got run over.

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What's black without keys. A keyboard after you hit it with a shovel.

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When you are swimming across the ocean, and you lose your wheels, what's the difference between a duck? ... Because bananas have no bones.

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An English man a Scotts man and an Irish man buy a helicopter between them,they go to pick it up after paying for it and realise that non of them can fly it. so they get a refund and go to the pub.

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How did the soccer team win? They scored the most goals.

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Two blondes are walking down the street. One breaks her left high heel and the other is called Monica.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the cactus cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens butt.

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Why are you asleep? Because I'm tired.

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Why did the girl fall off the couch? She had a seizure.

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A horse walks into a bar.. Several people get up and leave as they see the potential danger in the situation..

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How much stuff would a stuff muff huff if a stuff muff could huff stuff? Whole dang lotsa

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a muslim walks into a bar, he then remembers his religion forbids the drinking of alcohol and walks back out

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Ow, there's an arrow in my knee!

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Yo mama is so fat that it is obvious obesity runs in the family.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate nine.

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Why is 6 scared of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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You just threw a fireman and a baby out of a skyscraper... who arrived earth first? Adam and Eve. Moral: Because theology is bullshit.

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Why was the boy sad? His friend stabbed him with a fork. Also, his mother died. Also, his dad raped him Also, he has a chode. And it really sucks when you have a chode.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? Because it Died

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whats worse than ten dead babies in one trashcan? one dead baby in ten trashcans

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Why was the gorilla crying? His brother died

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Why did the girls head explode while eating supper? There was a grenade in her food.

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penis

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how do you wake lady gaga up? you hit her in the face with a frying pan

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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