A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" The owner of the horse then explains the evolution of the species and genetics. The bartender, satisfied, serves the owner a drink and gladly gives the horse water.

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Q: If I have 13 icecubes, and you have 12 icecubes, how many pancakes can I fit on the roof? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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YO MOMMA SO FAT... that it is really beginning to be an issue.

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Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Too bad I don't have one.

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Q: why did the girl fall off the swing?? A: because she had no arms or legs.

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A monkey enters a bar and climbs up on a stool. The bartender asks, "What'll ya have, pal?" The monkey, who can niether speak nor understand English, appears slightly perplexed.

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How do you get a small girl of a swing ? Throw a fridge at her

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Why did the old lady start crying? Because her daughter was raped and killed.

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did you hear the one about the boyscout and his scoutmaster? They had a lovely relationship, and both went on to be role models.

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hey, can you answer a question for me? yeah, sure. ThankYou!

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What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb? The lighbulb isn't also dying of terminal cancer.

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How can you kill a blonde? Hack her to bits.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot, you racist!

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A man walks into a bar. He has three drinks, then he leaves because he realizes he needs to get home because he has to get up early to go to his job in the morning.

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Caitlyn.

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I went to buy some camouflage shorst the other day but I couldn't find any.

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Johnny has 30 pints of ice cream. He eats 25 pints. What does Johnny have? Diabetes. Johnny has diabetes.

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A guy walks into a bar. Ouch

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What do you call something you should prepare yourself for when having sex with a prostitute? A.I.D.S

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Whats the difference between a chicken? One of its legs are both the same.

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Every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes.

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a guy who can fly walks up a hill and jumps off a cliff. his flying power fails him and he dies on impact

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What did one muffin in the oven say to the other muffin Nothing food doesn't talk

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A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender for 4 beers. The bartender replies, "One at a time, mate, will that work for you?" To which the man replies, "No", leaves, and drives his 1994 Toyota Corolla off of the road into the pit of a volcano.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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