Your Mommy is a gas pump.

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Why did Jimmy never like old people? Because he was abused as a child by one.

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what long green and bumpy? a pickle

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roses are red violets are blue , but i would't know that because u never bring me flowers, you bastard .

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okay so this guy walks into the bar and says DON BE STUPE SHE SPIT GOOD AND EVERYTHIN. why did he say that. BECAUSE EVERYBODY HATES HIS SPIT

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A dog walks into a bar Because the door was open -Tag

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how do you confuse a blond? put them in a circle room and tell them to sit in the corner

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? The person who made that "joke" down there has no life ?

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What do you call a Fat man? You call him by His name because that's the polite thing to do.

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What did the black man say when he noticed his crack was missing? I guess they fixed the sidewalk while I was at work.

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Knock knock Who's there? The events which followed are described by police as the August 4th massacre in which a family of five were brutally murdered by two prison escapees who broke into the house in search of a place to hideout.

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a man walks into a bar he has a drinking problem and we are all consered

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What do you do when your archenemy walks up to you? Kill them due to their vulnerability, I mean they walked up to you...

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Why did Bob the Builder die? He had cancer.

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It's Christmas in Iraq. Merry Christmas

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tommy is retared

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How do you make your grandma fly? Push her off the back of a plane.

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Teacher: which vegetable makes your eyes water? Student: Any vegetable. Teacher: How? Student: Just rub any vegetable in your eyes and see what happens.

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Why did the boy fail his test? Because he got shot before he could even study.

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How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? It is highly unlikely one would have a supply of dead babies large enough to answer this question.

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A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

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Q: Why do some women insist they don't have penises or testicles? All humans have penises and testicles! A: These women have been brainwashed by feminism. It's quite sad, really.

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Why was the washing machine laughing? Because you're on drugs.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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