Why was the little boy inside the house instead of playing with his friends outside? His dad just died from cancer.

4 gay men walk into a bar,but there is only one stool..... What do they do? Turn it over

Why was the Pizza Delivery boy crying? He was sad.

Friends are like balloons.. If you stab them they die.

I shot a bitch.

Have you ever seen Helen Keller's house? No. Neither did she.

what do you get if you put a baby in a microwave? an erection

Why was the boy in hospital? He fell off the bus and was run over by many cars.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "why the long face" The bartender then sees the horse's broken leg and proceeds to buy him a free drink.

did you know towels can cause dry skin?

A man walks into a bar, he now has a mild concussion

How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?  The woodchuck's ability to chuck has been left indeterminable. Therefore until the wood chuck's prowess in wood chucking is brought to light we must leave it a variable. Using the coefficient (L) to represent wood that can possibly be chucked. Then using (C) to represent the life cycle of said wood chuck chucking. We are also assuming this woodchuck will remain vigilante and not require food or sleep for the entire duration of chucking ultimately lowering is maximum chucking output. From this we can determine the W.C.P.S. (wood chucks per second). Finally subtract the remaining wood (RW) from the chucked total and we have rendered that :  L(W.C.P.S) - (C -RM/t) = X

The Charlotte Bobcats winning more than 10 games

I was Born ready I was born naked.

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to smash with a sledgehammer. The other is a baby.

Did you hear about the guy that told bad jokes? No.

24

Why can't Heller Keller drive? Because she was blind.

Knock knock? Who's there? A Jehovah's Witness. Oh. Knock knock? Who's there? Not me!

What's worse than the Holocaust? 2 Holocausts

Why did the chicken cross the road? like most animals that wander onto the road, it was completely unaware that the road can be very dangerous. It didn't go onto the road on purpose, it simply treated the road as if it was just like the rest of the ground.

it was a breazy night my pecker was shriveld up like a loose bit of ham. i tucked it in between my legs and dicided to pull my pants down to my ancles and began to run like a sissy. i saw a stumpy little juice ed in the distance it was peter andre he told me that he wanted a slut fucken and said he wanted to pull my banjo right back to the balls and suck it till the moon goes down i cumed all over his glasses then we began to kiss i bent over for him and he stook is fat fucken trout in my dark tight cave there was swet dripping from my cock aka carl mcvittie

One time, I called the police, but it was actually a fire. So my neighbors died.

What do you call a black priest? HOLY SHIT!!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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