Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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What's do a woman's vagina and a camel's toe have in common? Other than being parts of two mammals, they have nothing in common.

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whats worse than forgetting your lunch at home? getting diagnosed with type 1 diabetes.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin get in the Batmobile.

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Roses are red Violets are blue... Violets are not blue they are actually purple

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Why did the fish cross the road? Because the chicken was carrying an aquarium.

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What's worse than giong to Hell? Nothing. Hell is as bad as it gets.

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How do you turn a fruit into a vegetable? A car crash.

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Beating cancer. Guess Steve Jobs they didn't make an app for that.

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how do you know if your friend is your best friend? if he cries you cry, if he laughs you laughs, if he jumps out a window you laugh again.

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don't make holocaust jokes, my grandfather died in the holocaust, he fell out of the birds nest shooting Jews.

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What do you call cat that is on fire? Nigel.

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What is the only day of the year when you're guaranteed to find me? The day I kill you.

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What is blue and not heavy? Light blue!

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What is the best way to run a race? Start out fast, run fast in the middle, and finish fast.

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Q: What do you get if you combine a melody, instrumentation, rhythm, and vocals? A: Um, music, you idiot.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

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Knock knock Who's there? To To who? No, Sir, it is "to whom"

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Just happy you are back Nero, I have no idea what a proxy is but I am at my mum`s place, is everything alright between us now?

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what is worse than tripping over a tree root? getting mauled by a 60 foot bear

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I like my coffee the way I like my women.....without a penis.

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How do you kill a zombie? You don't. Zombies aren't real.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops