Person 1: Why does food from Subway taste so good? Person 2: I don't know, why? Person 1: Because their ingredients are fresh. Person 2: Um, OK? Person 1: Yeah, it's all under 18. Person 2: Shit...

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why was the cook arrested? Tax evasion.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

bronson watt walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

If your riding a jet ski and the wheels fall off Then how many pancakes does it take to Cover a dog house Purple because ice cream doesn't have Any bones

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What happens when 2 gay men rub their penises together Jello

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What crawls on the ground and shoots arrows? Legless Legolas.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

You have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars. You both have the same amount of money.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

There are two bears in a shower. One bear says "pass the soap." the other bear says "no soap. Radio."

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: Why do homeless people smell bad? A: Because they live on the street and they dont take showers it's very sad sometimes.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what is red with 2 legs? half a cat

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the lawyer name his daughter? Amanda.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What is the difference between a baby and a tree? Its not illegal to hit one with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what's worst then having no internet access for a year? having no facebook notifications when you finally do

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What does 1 black person on the moon mean? A problem. What do 2 black people on the moon mean? A problem. What does every black person on the world on the moon mean? It's still a problem.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the blonde waitress say to the man with a curly moustache? Good evening, are you ready to order?; yes [x2]; and what would you like with it?; certanly; there you go; no, I'm sorry; right.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

whats worse than being raped by a random stranger getting raped by your uncle

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why didn't the baby learn to walk? It got hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's the difference between zev hatis and a dwarf Nothing. They are both midgets and are going to die by the age of 25

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Brian knew how to save the world from the death penalty: "Let's kill everybody who is not against it." So I killed Brian and waste my time in death row now.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Heheheheh, Good one, you made me laugh, you just made me realize that it was indeed I that said that to you once, and now you are telling me. I know now, I am happy, not because I seek happiness, but because thinking, finding solutions, guiding myself and others, is what makes me happy. I feel like an alien, because my ideals, my solutions hopes and dreams that grow out of a result of my constant thinking, will never be in this world. Yet I also feel human now, because it could have been, humanity could have succeeded...

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Whats two plus two? Miles

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A forty-year-old man forces a young child to strip down and take a shower. The child screams and cries, but the man persists angily. He then carries the child into his bed. The child pleads, "Help! Mom, make him stop!" The mother yells back, "Just listen to him. He's your father and it's past your bedtime." This is a common night-time routine for parents with their first child

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Knock knock. Who's there? Doctor Doctor Who? Doctor Brown, I have your test results, you've HIV positive.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops