How do you kill a blue elephant? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a red elephant? Spray paint it blue then shoot it with a blue elephant gun

A man copied someone else's joke on anti-joke, people looked at it and said "That's funny, but they copied it", then they moved on to the next one.

Some really old band covered Dirty Bit. But the cut out the Dirty Bit part so its just the Time of life part

What is the difference between a pillow and a rock The rock could hert you.

If this becomes top-viewed I will post more milk related jokes

Why do Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles always smile? Because they enjoy there life even though there both blind.

Why do fat people make such good slaves? They're too fat and lazy to escape. Unfortunately, if you want your slave to be fat, you actually have to feed it properly.

So much with being an author... You with the Feds? The CIA?

What do you call a bear. Rob.

What is the oppisite of water? Dry!

Why did the clown chase the boy? The boy was sad and needed cheering up

Why did the man lose his job at the orange juice factory? Because the economy is shitty and none of the higher ups are willing to take a pay cut and they’re still paying themselves massive bonuses, the result of which are layoffs across all departments.

Did you just admit being considerate? I do not care about who gets the last comment anymore, I need to tear my face away from the screen ASAP.

Why did the woman cross the road? Why the hell is she out of the kitchen!

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Put down your barbie. Get in the car.

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

Wood is brown...... Grass is green...... Now what color are roses?

hi jonny

I had a submarine.... once

Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme Refrigerator

A nuclear device is dropped on hiroshima. Does it make a sound? The answer is yes because the americans are laughing in Enola Gay

A blonde lady has a sore throat. Her colleague tells her that whenever she has a sore throat, she performs oral sex on her husband and swallows, and this cures the problem. The next day, the blonde comes into work. The colleague asks if she followed her advice, and the blonde says yes and it worked. The blonde also passes a message from her boyfriend thanking her colleague for the suggestion. The two sets of spouses eventually became close friends and were godparents to each others' children.

What's brown and sticky? A stick!

casey, that is all, ruddel, that is all, hi mark

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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