What looks like a lion, sounds like a lion, and feels like a lion? A lion Ba dum chh

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse unable to comprehend english shits on the floor and leaves

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Why was the iPhone screen cracked? Because it was dropped on a rock.

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Ubisoft 'Very Impressed' By Pokemon Go, Working on AR game of their own.

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What did the guy say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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A blind man asked me out last night. I told him I was seeing someone...

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What's the difference between a banana and a monkey? They're both yellow, except the monkey

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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ohai. whutz en ahntei johk? sownz soopihd.

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My brother and I laugh at how competitive we used to be. But I laugh harder

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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Why did the man fall on the floor? He had a heart attack.

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I put the word **** in a post. Anti Joke starred it and the joke didn't make sense anymore.

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Why does the Gay guy have a bell on his bike? Because its the only way his blind dog can follow him.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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Sam Hengal.

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what has wheels and drives? a boat i lied about the wheels

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What did Dr. Pepper say to Sprite? I'm a Doctor.

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Q: What's worse than spilling milk all over the floor? A: Cleaning up the milk you spilled all over the floor.

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What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar and the bartender says, " OH MY GOD! YOU CAN WALK?!?!"

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Women's Rights Movement

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How are Lamborghinis and piles of dead babies alike? I don't have either in my garage. Except for the pile of dead babies.

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How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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