What do you call a redneck virgin? A seven year old who can run faster than her brothers.

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What did the boy with arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Little Timmy walks up to the teacher during class and asks "Can i use the restroom?" The teacher says "I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy says "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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Why did the little boy fall of his bicycle? It was the first time he road without his training wheels.

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What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

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A man calls his wife, but she doesn't pick up. He comes home and shouts his wife's name, but no one responds. He walks upstairs and sees the bedroom door half-opened. He enters and sees his wife sleeping.

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Roses are green,violets are blue,i'm high as ****,is that perfume or glue?

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A guy walks in to a bar and says to the bartender "I'm fed up with all these 'guy walks into a bar' jokes on anti-joke. The bartender says "I have no idea what you're talking about".

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Roses are red Violets are blue Peas are green Plums are purple Thieves are black

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why couldnt the guy move his legs cuz he was paralyzed

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Hold on. Let me think of an answer.

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An Asian tries to climb a staircase in a wheelchair. He finds this difficult, because he is in a wheelchair.

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Roses are Brown Violets are Brown Whos been shitting on my garden??

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Why did the alcoholic stumble into a bar? Because he was bleeding profusely and was desperately seeking a telephone to contact the nearest hospital.

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What do chicken and babies have in common? They both taste like chicken.

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What happens if a Muslim leaves their bag on a bus? They quickly return onto the bus and get it.

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Why did the man get ran over by th STREET? Because he crossed the TURTLE!

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Why was the Islamic woman killed? She insulted Allah.

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A black man and a mexican are falling off a cliff. Who lands first? The police officer.

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why are black people good at basketball cuz their tall

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What do you call a black person who has fallen? an ambulance

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris? All of it.

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Why couldn't Matilda walk to school? Because a dog ripped her legs off.

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Two men walk into a bar, one ducks

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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