Why are fish so easy to weigh? Because usually they've been killed, stunned or sedated first.

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ecks! why zee?

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You

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A man walks into a sofa. BANG

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Why was the black man out of a job? because he was recently laid off and had not found any job offerings that he would be interested in

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What did the waffle say when the black guy started eating him? Nothing, because waffles are inanimate objects and therefore cannot talk.

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What do you call a Mexican? Whatever his name is you racist.

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How do you save the world in 2012? You aren't. 2012 isn't going to happen!

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What happened when the black man and the white woman mated? Nothing. The man was infertile.

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Q: what did one kangaroo say too the other kangaroo? A: I was told I am schizophrenic.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia And so do I..

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What do you call a poldo thats hafl poldo a

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Why did the car stop To buy drugs

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A Black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Who is driving? The black guy. Its his car.

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What's the worst thing about gang rape? Going last.

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don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!

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what do you call a man who go his head cut off in a car accident? dead.

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Knock, Knock! Who's there? Hatch! Hatchoo! Bless you!

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A kangaroo walks into a bar, he hops up to the bartender, and asks for a martini. The bartender, not knowing exactly what to do, goes into the back to his boss's office. He says "Hey, there's a kangaroo up front askin' for a martini...do we serve kangaroos?" His boss replies "Ya, of course, but these kangaroos, they aren't too smart, so charge him like 50 bucks for the drink." The bartender agrees and goes back up front to serve the kangaroo. He pours the martini and hands it to the kangaroo, the kangaroo thanks him and says "How much do I owe you?" The bartender replies "50 bucks." The kangaroo then reaches into his pouch, pulls out a fifty dollar bill, and puts it on the counter. He finishes his drink and begins to hop away. As he is leaving, the bartender says "Hey, wait, we don't get many of your kind around here, why is that?" And the kangaroo replies "I'm not surprised at THESE prices!!!" and hops out.

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Whats the most fun thing you can do with hangers and a vaccum cleaner? -abort babies

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because, it realized that it was worth something in life, it had a meaning, a purpose, and a right to freedom, to go where it pleased. The chicken's first act of this freedom was to go across the street.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Jon "Bones" Jones will be fighting Rashad Evans for the Light Heavyweight title tonight at 10PM Eastern time at UFC145.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave Smith. Oh, hey Dave. Come in.

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What is worst than your girlfriend's mother?? Osama Bin Laden's One

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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