What did Stephen Hawking say to a prostitute? Push me, and then just touch me, Till I can get my, Satisfaction.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Roses are red, violets are blue, some people are gay, and so are you

What is the difference between a rabbit and a plum? A: They are both purple, except for the rabbit!

Whats more painful than falling onto a sharp stone? Suffering the loss of your mother and newborn brother in a tragic car accident on your birthday.

Roses are red Violets are actually the color violet, contrary to popular belief.

why did the chicken cross the road? IDGAC

What do you get when you put a black guy in a blender. Why are you still reading....

Roses are roses Violets are violets Sugar is sugar And you're a person

Roses are red Violets are red Grass is red OMFG MY LAWN IS ON FIRE !!!?

Whats the difference between 10 dead babies and 8 dead babies? 2 dead babies.

Wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is the girl next door.

What do you call mexicans running down the hallway? JAIL BREAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

a kid plays computer games alot and gets carpoltunel in both hands and lives in pain for the rest of his life.

Why did the man pull out his chainsaw? To get rid of a tree in his front yard.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Q: What did the tree say as he fell? A: Studies have shown plants in general do not have a voice box, thus making plants incapable of speaking.

Q: Why didn't the dirty man jump into the shower? A: Because he spotted the potential danger to jump into a slippery shower and proceeded with caution.

What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

Knock Knock Whose there? Ben Dover Come in

u are so............................................................................................................................................................................................gay

What sport do all black people like? This is impossible to answer because not all black people like the same sport.

What do you get a man that has evreything? Aids

(This poem is written by a dog) Roses are gray Violets are a different shade of gray Let's go chase cars

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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