What do black people eat? Food.

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One out of every 3 smokers dies.................. the rest gain immortality.

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How did the blond know that you like her? You said,"Baby, I like you"

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Why are Chinese people short? Chinese people are often exposed to harmful chemicals because of lax environmental laws, and suffer from poor nutrition.

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Q: What did the terrorist do when he walked into the football stadium? A: Set off a bomb, killing him and others there

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Q: What do you get when you put a boy and a girl together in a locked room? A: Blood and gore.

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Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Half a shit.

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Im Harold Camping.... and i enjoy scaring the shit out of you

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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Remember how I made you hypnotically cum by poking your own nose last time? When I told you that hypnotic story about the astrologer and the brain surgeon? So you wet yet? Think about how easy its going to be for me when I take out Mr.Big and slap down your coffee table with it, yeah... Feels cozy down there does it not?

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Why did the student get expelled from a Christian school? He continually beat other students between class periods.

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Why do white people not eat crackers? Cause it's cannabalism.

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why do black people like lotion? because everybody else does.

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What is a poop on a poopstick? A pile of poop.

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How do you get a clown off a swing set? You throw an axe at his head when he's not looking.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Q: Whats black and hangs from a tree???? A: A tire!!!!!!!!!!!

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Whats worse than finding a worm in an apple? Getting shot in the gut What's worse than that? Getting raped in the hole made by the bullet

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Why was the baseball player happy? He got married.

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Does that doctor take insurance? No, the receptionist takes the insurance, the doctor takes your blood... Well actually, the nurse does that.

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Whats brown and slippery? A brown slipper.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because of excess velocity.

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Steve Jobs is alive In our Hearts <3

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops