why couldnt the guy move his legs cuz he was paralyzed

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An Asian tries to climb a staircase in a wheelchair. He finds this difficult, because he is in a wheelchair.

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What do chicken and babies have in common? They both taste like chicken.

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What did the boy with arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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why did the giraffe cross the road? because my dad and his "fishing buddies" are having another "meeting" in the basement. I hear weird noises, and I haven't seen my little sister in weeks, since the last "meeting." Dad said she went to a special camp for little girls. I hear horrible noises.

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A man calls his wife, but she doesn't pick up. He comes home and shouts his wife's name, but no one responds. He walks upstairs and sees the bedroom door half-opened. He enters and sees his wife sleeping.

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What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

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Why did the little boy fall of his bicycle? It was the first time he road without his training wheels.

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Roses are green,violets are blue,i'm high as ****,is that perfume or glue?

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What do you call a redneck virgin? A seven year old who can run faster than her brothers.

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Little Timmy walks up to the teacher during class and asks "Can i use the restroom?" The teacher says "I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy says "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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knock knock Person A: who's there Person A: oh shit that was me

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Q: What did the teacher say at the end of recess. A: "Recess is over."

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why did jim die? he had cancer why did jim have no hair? it started to fall out when he was 20 and now he is bald at 30 years old

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How do five Jews get to America? They get their passports and ride a public plane, safely leaving the airport and getting on a taxi to go to their hotel.

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When does the ice cream get thrown at the yellow horse on thursday evening? Purple Monkey Rainbow

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Justin's life

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hey

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What do a squirrel and a cigarette have in common? -They are both perfectly harmless until you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire.

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What's worse than the holocaust? The holocaust was one of the most terrible incidents in history there are very few things worse than.

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A black man is like a sledge hammer; if you compare him to a sledge hammer, he will hit you with a sledge hammer.

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You know what likes to get fisted? Sock puppets.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris? All of it.

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Why couldn't Matilda walk to school? Because a dog ripped her legs off.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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