"Have you got any Saturday jobs available?" "Yes"

What did Batman say to Robin after they got on the bus? We should have taken the batmobile.

What the man from the arapahoe tribe say to the mexican who was living in a trash bag? You should try a hotel room. They comfortably sleep 67-493 mexicans.

where is the world?

whats blue and fluffy? blue fluff.

Q: What do you call those assholes who always volunteer in lectures? A: Assholes. Fcuking assholes. They created the word asshole. Assholes

ive got nothing funny to say, so this is what its like to be a woman

Knock, Knock Who's There? An Orange No Seriously Who Are You?

A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

What did the boy dog say to the girl dog? Ruff

Knock Knock whose there YOUR MOM

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Why did he? NO I LOST THE CHICKEN Later: Knock knock Who's there The chicken

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

CAVE JOHNSON.

Why did the poorly educated man get fired from the M&M factory? He changed the M's to W's!

Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he's rich...

Why did the man suddenly burst into flames in room. The room was dark, so he lit a match. It turns out there was hydrogen in the room and when fire touches hydrogen, it sets on fire.

2 brothers were arguing, both had anger problems to the point where one started war with the other. Boy1: I HATE YOU Boy2: MOM HATES YOU Boy1: ....Wait why? Boy2: YOU WERE AN ACCIDENT SHE TRIED TO SELL YOU TO A MEXICAN AND HE SAID THAT THING WAY TOO DAM UGLEH ITD BURN THE FACES OFF MY COWS.

How do you kill a retard? you shoot him in the head

how did the family die? They were shot in the head.

Q: Whats the worst thing to drop in a prison shower? A: An exploding nail gun

How do you save Africa. Put a rash of bacon in and envelope.

The cast of the 'Jersey Shore' is the worst thing to happen to the Jersey shore

Why are elephants big, grey, and wrinkly? Because if they were small, round, and white, they would be called 'asprin'.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...