What's worse than bombs? Nukes

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Q: What kind of punch do vampires drink ? A: None... It's really blood, you should know that by now.

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full house should of been called black jack, because the Olsen twins started getting hit on at age 8 and didn't stop til they were 21

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Where do you send a Jew with ADD? A concentration camp.

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This is an anti joke

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Why are black people so fast? They probably practice.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice tits

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im at school

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What's beauitful and disgusting at the same time? Menstration. Jk it's just disgusting.

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Pizza guy. Just a minute, I have to grab my wallet.

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Some anti-jokes are funny, some are not!

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Hello

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What did Helen Keller do at a concert? Sit.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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What did the hedgehog say to the beaver? Nothing, they can't talk.

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I found out I had asthma earlier today. I was breathless.

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How do you annoy a farmer? Shoot his wife.

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A girlfriend told her boyfriend it soaked all the way through. She screwed up their art project.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills.

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What do you call someone that blows up a plane? Nothing you were on that plane

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This is no joke. Well, I did warn you.

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A. What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew: B. Pizza's don't scream when you put them into a oven.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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3 Blondes walk into a bar. One ducks, the other two are hospitalized with mild concussions

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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