There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

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Why did the man pull out his chainsaw? To get rid of a tree in his front yard.

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What do you call a monkey holding a hand grenade? It depends on what its name is.

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to get to the other side.

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What is worse than getting stung by a bee? Watching your family die in a fire.

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Whats red and yellow? A chicken in the blender.

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What do you get when you put a black guy in a blender. Why are you still reading....

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What do you call it when a dead man has his wallet stolen? Rob Zombie.

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what do a black guy and a white guy have in common? neither of them are purple

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How do you put a bananna in a mini-van? Walk up to the mini-van and stick it in the backseat.

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A paraplegic wheels himself into a bar. The barman asks, 'What can I get you?' 'Nothing,' replies the paraplegic, 'I've just pissed myself and I need you to help me clean myself up.'

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being raped by your uncle

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He was a well respected member of the community.

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You know what happened when I kissed a girl? I enjoyed it so immensely that I received an erection.

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Why did the girl fall of the swing? Because she was shot in the face by a lone gunman.

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Periods are red, waffles are blue, some poems rhym, this one doesn't.

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What did Santa say to the prostitute? "Merry Christmas!"

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What's the differences between oranges? Trees don't have doors.

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Why doesn't Mexico have an Olympic team? They do, they just choose not to compete certain years.

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What's black, white, black, white, black, white, and red? A horse with it's heard chopped off.

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If you go to a restaurant and you have more food on your plate then someone who is obese, you KNOW you have too much food.

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why did the girl go into the kitcen? she was preparing a meal for her well safisticated family which had not ate dinner yet that day.

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Knock Knock Come in.

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Friends are like balloons.. If you stab them they die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops