If Chuck Norris has $5, and you have $5, Chuck Norris still has more money than you.

What did the Black construction worker say to the Asian salesman? I want some milk.

What do you call a guy who died in a stampede? Grandpa.

What would George Washington be doing if he was alive today? Scratching and screaming at the bottom of his coffin.

What is black and white and red all over? A road killed zebra.

How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

What do you call a gay scientologist? His first name or last name, depending on how close you 2 are.

Q-Jetski A-How is olive oil made?

A Christian and an Atheist are in a bar, the Christian turns to the Atheist and says "If you don't believe in god you will go to hell." The Atheist replies "Your Mom doesn't believe in god." And then turns around to order another drink.

How do you keep an elephant from charging? Shoot it with a high powered gun right between the eyes.

what do you call a rich, gay guy from Florida? Iron man

You have such a big heart (Girlfriend) The doctor's think dangerously so (Guy)

Hail Heetluh

Yo mama is so stuPid that she blew a man for bus money then walked home

taking out the trash... at night

If your waiting in a restaurant for a waiter, doesn't that make you a waiter? O.o

im not black, im Joseph Kony

Why don't elderly people act their age? because they die.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Unless your father is a doctor and you live with him.

PIED NINNY!

Yo dawg, I heard you like cars. Thats cool, whats your favorite one?

Shush girl, shut your lips do the Helen Keller and advocate the rights the disabled.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, there is no reason for a chicken to need to cross a road.

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a larger worm in your apple.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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