What did one penguin say to the other? Flippty-flop-dop-boop-de-bop. Jazzhands.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you catch an elephant? Dig a nice deep hole in the ground, and fill it with ashes. Next, line the outside of the hole with peas. When the elephant comes to take a pea, kick it in the ash hole.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Three men walk into a bar. They order drinks. This joke isn't funny.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

POLITE NOTICE: Management Committee here. Please refrain from posting any anti-jokes which are not offensive to protected groups.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Lad: Whats that smell Girl: Nothing Lad: That is right nothing now get into the kitchen!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q.why did the monkey fall out the tree? A. it was dead Q. why did the second monkey fall out the tree? A. it was hanging onto the first one Q. why did the third monkey fall out the tree? A. peer pressure

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q. How do you kill a dumb blonde? A. Shoot her.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Your mom.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

look this kid up on facebook and spam him!! its funny, Josh Noonan, also his cell number is 603 560 3399....

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Actually it was me Josh brown

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What mother loved her son so much, she gave him a scar on his forehead for it? Lily Potter.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did I laugh at a joke? Cuz it was funny

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What Do You Call a Black Man With a Gun?? A Cop

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why can't Johnny ride a bike? Because Johnny is a potato.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

why was the cream sad? he was frozen and turned into a popular dessert

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q:Where was The Declaration of Independence signed? A: At the bottom

thumb_up thumb_down -12

HITLER IS SO SEXY I WOULD PAY A MILLION DOLLARS TO HAVE SEX WITH HIS DEAD HOT BODY WHENEVER I THINK ABOUT HIM I SPRAY MY SEMEN ALL OVER MY JEWISH SLAVES YUMMY HITLER JUST MAKES ME WANT TO BITE HIS ROTTING PENIS OFF AND FORCE IT IN THE EYE SOCKET OF A JEWISH PERSON AND THEN I CUM IN HIS EYESOCKET

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Did you hear about the guy who got his whole left side cut off? Now he is dead..

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? one is fun to hit with a sledge hammer, and one is a watermelon

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what do u get when you cross a monkey, a sock and wheels? A: a sock monkey. I was kidding about the wheels

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Radical thinkers have decided to end abortion they will begin to kill everyone who has an abortion.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the family at dinner not tip the waiter? He was mean and spat in their food.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops