Two Jews walked into a bar. Then bought it.

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A deaf man walks into a bar. Minutes later, cops come in and arrests the poor man for not paying his bill while the deaf man sits at the bar calmly drinks his beer.

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A boy walks home from school. On his way home some bullies stole his kite. When the boy got home he was greeted by a police officer that told him that his parents had been killed. The boy started crying and the Police officer said " whats wrong?". The boy replied " some bullies stole my kite".

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what is more funny than watching a baby fly in a circle at 100 mph stopping it with a shovel

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How are a black man, a hispanic man, and a chinese man similar? Believe it or not they all love cantaloupe!

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So a guy is on his way to work and he nearly gets hit by a bus. He sticks his middle finger up at the bus driver but a couple seconds later he realized that it was the same bus he was supposed to get on so he apologized to the bus driver and got on the bus. He was 15 minutes late for the 420th time this week so he was fired from his job and went back home. On his way home he was not allowed on the bus because he left his oyster card somewhere so he had to walk home. 69 minutes later he arrives home to his wife and kids. What did the man say to his wife when he got back home? "Hi."

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z1Kuo-n7Du0

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Question: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Answer: Being raped by a giant scorpion.

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Q: What do you call a black pilot. A: A pilot you racist.

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Yo momma so fat, she's in the hospital dying of morbid obesity. Sorry man.

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thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

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What did hitler say to Osama Bin Laden? Nothing they were born at different times

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A man is walking on the beach, he trips on a mystical lamp and dusts i off a little. turns out that it was just a lamp, he droped it back on the sand and was arrested for littering.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Tourette's, PENIS.

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I get more excited then my dog when I give her a treat

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What do you call a hit and run victim with multiple injuries? An ambulance.

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knock knock who's their panda panda who shut up I never said yo name and don't call me black

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That moment when the best part of your life is when you get 50 friends on Facebook....

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What's black and white and red all over? Nothing, it is impossible for something to be red all over if there is black and white also.

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What do you call a room full of jewish women with yeast infections? The waiting room of a gynecologists office, potentially in some sort of Jewish district

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What happened to the clown that touched the kid? The clown got honked up

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A bus full of retarded kids got broken on his way. One kid suggested to the bus driver that the problem could be with the brakes, as that kid's father was a mechanic.

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mom and dad went into the bedroom after a long day at work the fell asleep

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The girl was really drunk and passed out. She woke up the next day with a hangover.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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