Two fish walked into a bar. They died. Because fish can't breathe out of water.

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What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

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A blonde was drinking water from the water fountain. She was very thirsty.

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Whats more painful than falling onto a sharp stone? Suffering the loss of your mother and newborn brother in a tragic car accident on your birthday.

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Why did the baby stop laughing? Would you if you pooped your pants?

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A Jew buys something that is not on sale

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What sport do all black people like? This is impossible to answer because not all black people like the same sport.

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John went to the shop to purchase a can of coca cola. He left the shop with a can of coca cola.

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Chuck Norris threw a grendade, killed 50 people, then it exploded This is a highly improbable event considering no man is faster then a grenade

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What did Stephen Hawking say to a prostitute? Push me, and then just touch me, Till I can get my, Satisfaction.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate nine.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Delivery for a Mr. Peerson? Oh yes, that's me. Thank you.

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A woman leaves the kitchen.

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What happened to the little boys house? It burned down. How did the boy die? In the fire.

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Q: What did the dog say the cat? A: nothing, because dogs cannot speak, and even if they could, I highly doubt they would speak cat.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like you Get in the van

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Why did the chicken cross the road?

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was no traffic for miles and the chicken was in search of basic needs.

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A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to a near by hospital where he is treated for a concussion.

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What's endangered like the Spotted Owl? A Cancer patient.

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billy has 100 candy bars he eats 78 of them what does he have now diabetes

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Periods are red, waffles are blue, some poems rhym, this one doesn't.

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Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and they stink.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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