how do you put a elephant in a fridge? open it and put it inside. how do you put a lion in a frige? you take out the elephant and put in the lion. there is a meeting for all the animals in the world which animal doesnt go? the lion because he's in the fridge. a man callshis dog and it doesnt come why not? because its at the meeting

What's worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm. Being raped. What's worse than being raped. Being raped twice. What's worse than being raped twice. Biting into your apple and finding a worm then throwing away that apple, retrieving another apple them biting into it and finding another worm then being raped twice. In the same 5 minutes.

A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

A man said to his friend that he looks like his mom died. the other man started to cry due to the fact that it was acctually his dad

Lollies are sweet warheads are sour, open your legs and feel my power

KNOCK KNOCK whos there Malcom i dont know any Malcom go away!

Heil Hitler!!!!!! Why thankyou General Himmler. Would you care to join me for supper this evening?

What do you call 4 black men in a BMW? Successful Businessmen.

knock knock, Whos there ?? Johnny. Come in fish.

A man walks into a bar at 1 in the afternoon. He's the bartender and a fellow employee asked him to cover the afternoon shift.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt, it was hit by a car

HAHAHAHAH Shut up Andra no one likes you

If atheism is a religion, then not collecting stamps is a hobby.

what did the pumpkin muffin say to the blueberry muffin? nothing, because muffins can't talk.

if a dog won't bark, there's no way you can teach it to talk.

Why did the man with every known fatal disease die? Old age.

Knock Knock Who's there? Sorry, wrong house.

A duck walks into a bar.... Duck: Can I have a glass of water? Bartender: How would you like to pay for it? Duck: Put it on my bill

Why are there clocks on stoves? Because it is a convenient way to tell the time.

what's the only thing funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? The look on the mom's face.

I forgot how the joke starts but the punchline goes something something something your moms a slut.

Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

What's worse than 10 babies in a trashcan? One baby in 10 trashcans.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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