How many dead babies will fit in a bathtub? Seventeen

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I live in a very rural area, so it's not easy to just go to the store and pick something up. I try to find out how to do things with the stuff I have on hand, so I Googled spot remover, but there are only pictures of stain cleaners. Please help. Spot has rabies.

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whats dumb and small? dandruff

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I have CDO it's like OCD but in the right order

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Knock Knock Who's there? Johnny Johnny who? Johnny your son let me in mom! Son, I have something to tell you. What? Well, you're actually adopted *sobs*

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What's 21 and pregnant? Ariana Grande

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his toadstool.

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What did the mother say to her son? I have Leukemia.

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A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. I just bought a new xbox.

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What do you call a black woman in a pool? Drowning.

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What is old and fancy and comes in two pieces? Marie Antoinette.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the sidewalk he was on does not.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Whats more sad then four black men in a car driving off a cliff? The man they stolen the car from doesn't have car insurance.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? I don't know, he couldn't open the presents.

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What did Hitler say to his wife? It's time to go start the Holocaust.

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Why didn't the blonde finish her book? She died.

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knock knock..... ding dong...... knock knock!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! they weren't home

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Angus is so Scottish he wears a kilt when it is socially appropriate.

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Who would win in a fight between superman and flash? Chuck Norris

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Q. Whats black and rhymes with Snoop? A. Dr Dre

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Roses are red, violets are blue you may not know this but I'm falling for you . <3

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A man walks into a Norfolk pub. The landlord (not being very worldly) notices he is of Middle Eastern descent and asks "are you Bin Laden"? To this the man replies "No I bin Swaffham". (Needs to be said in Norfolk accent)

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Knock Knock! Whos there? Doctor! Doctor who? exactly.. how did you know?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops