why do black people like lotion? because everybody else does.

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What do you get when you jump into the Red Sea? Wet.

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Why was the man lying on the pavement? He was hit by a fridge

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Remember how I made you hypnotically cum by poking your own nose last time? When I told you that hypnotic story about the astrologer and the brain surgeon? So you wet yet? Think about how easy its going to be for me when I take out Mr.Big and slap down your coffee table with it, yeah... Feels cozy down there does it not?

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I was gonna smack jakes titties...but michael was already doing it....:/

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What does an elephant and a plum have in common? They are both purple... except for the elephant

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What is a poop on a poopstick? A pile of poop.

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It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Roses are red.

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There's 2 black guys in a car. Who's driving. Probably one of the 2 men.

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What did the black guy say in the phone? Hello

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Whats worse than Holocaust Anti-Jokes? Oh, a lot of things, actually. Personally, I find them hilarious.

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You know what's sad and Funny? When a guy walks into a gay bar and doesn't get hit on.

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A: Knock knock B:The door is open.

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Why did the black man jump out of the plane? He was going on a parachute dive with his friend.

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A horse walks in a bar. The barman asks: "Why the long face?" The horse replies: I have aids.

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There's 3 guys, a fat guy, a skinny guy, and muscular guy. 7 days later, the fat guy receives an invitation to the zoo. It turns he got a new job and his friends was so proud.

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One dog says to the other "I love going for walks!" A women over-hears, screams "A Talking Dog!", and calls the police. The dog is put down and dissected for scientific research.

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What is the difference between a car accident and being on your period? A period is less bloody.

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What Do You Call A Black Guy Surrounded By Nine White Guys With Bats? Jackie Robinson.

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What did the mute person tell the deaf person? Nothing. Even if sound could emit from his vocals the impaired of hearing person would still be unable to respond unless they have taken classes to read lips. The deaf person didn't take classes nor did the mute person learn sign language.

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A man visits his doctor for an annual checkup. "Doc, I feel great! I'm running 5 miles a day, I just got promoted at work, and sex with my wife has never been better!" A few weeks later, his doctor calls him in. When he arrives, the doctor looks at him grimly. "I have some bad news. You have lung cancer." "But how? I don't smoke. My wife doesn't smoke. I have never felt better." The doctor pats him on the back, reassuringly. "This may be true, but you still have lung cancer."

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A man walks into a bar, he is then escorted to the hospital as a result of brain trauma.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? I've often heard that a room with a million monkeys with a million typewriters, given enough time; would eventually reproduce the complete works of Shakespeare. This seems to suggest that if something has an extremely low chance of happening, it will still eventually happen if enough attempts are made. However, I feel that the aforementioned scenario, given enough time to play out, would only result in a room full of dead monkeys. Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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