Q:why did the boy not have to walk his dog? A: because the dog and the rest of his family died in a terrible house fire while he was away at summer camp.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's blue and white and can't climb a tree? A fridge in a denim jacket!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's the difference between a blonde and a carrot? One's a human, the other's a vegetable.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why the monkey fall out the tree? Cause he was dead!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's the ultimtate guerilla camoflauge at night time? Black people.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A Mormon walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

SpiderMan, under that mask and your superhero clothes who are You really? Under these clothes, I...Am.... naked

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: What do you call a black woman who can't tell you who her baby daddy is? A: "Mam". Rape is a serious and painful crime, and the strength to raise a child on her own without her consent is worthy of respect.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Dislike this.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I've lost my electron!! Are you sure? Yes! I'm Positive!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's funnier than a jalapeño? A jalapeño on a stick.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q. Wheres your nan???? A. In my closet

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why was Armando unable to be found by his friend Ashley ? A: They both were murdered 7 years ago, and bodies are unable to do anything if they lost their soul that was with that body.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

you know its foggy outside when you step outside and its foggy outside.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Some people like melon and others like soup.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

yo mamma so ugly I think she has cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why the chimp fell off the tree? Because it's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Roses are rainbow. Violets are rainbow. Everything is rainbow. Thats why you don't take LSD.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

The man says to the doctor "Sir, I have contracted a terrible headache." The doctor replies back, "Yes you do."

thumb_up thumb_down -7

jibby jobby

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why couldn't the bird fly? cause it was a penguin

thumb_up thumb_down -7

This night was a stormy one, alot was destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could blind some. Jonny lived in Ristoville, a village atop a hill. Citizens of Ristoville were frightened for their lives, all but Jonny. He was bullied from a young age of 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest, full-time. Fear shined in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He pondered this, and ultimately came to the conclusion that there will be nothing worse out there than Uncle Clive's "Magical Basement of Happiness". Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible. Finally, Rosie Harrison, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Crystal Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless failed suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonathon's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her fragile little ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a couple cartons of Apple and Blackcurrant Ribena and his Grandfather's lucky medallion and took his first step outside. He whipped out a carton of Ribena, strongly crumpled up the carton, slightly spraying pure fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the drooping wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and with a cry so intense, shouted, "Nothing will stop me!!". Jonny died shortly after of AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 5 years in a high security prison for child molestation and consistant child abuse and paedophillia. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

person 1. Did you here about the black guy who went to college? person 2.no person 1. either have i whats ironic is that they are both black

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Three Arabian men are on a plane, they stand up, and shout BOMB, BOMB, BOMB! All three have Tourettes.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops