Why is my room black and white? Because your in a black and white movie.

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What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? He called the police.

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*knock knock* *knock knock * ? ? The man didnt answer because he died of a stroke

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Sugar is sweet, And so is she.

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what did the iphone say to the galagy s3? nothing they are phones.

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how do you stop a bus? Well, just up the road is a stop sign so the bus will stop there because it is illegal to go through a stop sign without stopping.

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Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first one says, "Pass the soap." "No soap, radio," replies the second one. "Oh, you want me to turn on the shower radio?" "Yeah, it's too quiet in here. I could use some tunes." The first polar bear turns on the radio. "Now pass me the soap, please," he says. The second bear passes him the soap, he washes his face and neck, and then they both get out and towel off. The second bear switches off the radio before they leave the bathroom.

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Why did the Black man kill the White man? So he could end up in jail with the rest of his family.

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Yesterday, my friend said I should facebook him. So I slammed a book into his face.

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A blind man watches TV

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Why did the woman pay $5,000 for a gallon of milk? She didn't. She paid $2.99.

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Why did the man look up into the sky? carrot cake

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If it looks like a chicken and acts like a chicken, its most likely not a deadly crab running towards you with a knife that has rabies and is afraid of towels.

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“Knock knock” “Who's there?” “Jesus” “Jesu.............wait, REALY?” “No,Jesus is currently "dead".”

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What did the kitten say to the ant? Nothing, it was dead. - Driiiftz

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How I Met Your Mother, starring Oedipus Rex

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what is the difference between jelly and jam? jelly is smoother where jam has chunks of fruit in it...... and i cant jelly my penis down your throat

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How do you stop a baby from crawling around in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor.

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There was once a man with a penis so huge, his girlfriend liked their sexual experiences very much. A year later they got married and had kids, however the man got fired from his accounting job and it all went downhill.

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Why can't Micheal J. Fox draw a perfectly straight line? It is impossible for humans to draw perfect lines.

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Students, please find the surface integral.

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What's worse than a completely overused anti-joke punchline? The Holocaust.

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What did the poor family eat for thanksgiving? Food

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A man is talking with his friend when suddenly he picks up a banana. He starts talking with the banana, and after a while of conversing the man sadly puts down his banana and says to his friend, "I'm sorry but your son has just died in a horrible accident."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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