What did the ice cream man ask the little boy? Want some ice cream?

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What is the difference between a clown and a dead baby? One makes you laugh and one is just a clown.

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what has 2 legs and bleeds? Half a dog.

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Are you a tree

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Why did the Mexican jump of the roof? Because he had a serious meth addiction that was destroying his family and he could not live with the awful things he did to get his fix.

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What happened to the boy who spilled his fruit punch on the president? He was offered a new one compliments of Obama himself.

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How do you get a girl out of a tree? You throw a refrigirator at her.

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Roses are red violets are blue next thing you know my D*** is in you

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Roses are red violets are blue I can't rhyme fridge

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What did the dog say to his own poop? You gonna eat that?

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Why did the

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Why did the mentally disabled child begin to cry? Because he shit himself

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Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the barber shop, which was located on the other side of the road. He then walked to the crosswalk, patiently waited, then crossed when the little person lit up.

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Knock knock Who's there? The events which followed are described by police as the August 4th massacre in which a family of five were brutally murdered by two prison escapees who broke into the house in search of a place to hideout.

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Why did the little boy stick a fork in the electrical socket? Because he wanted to escape his abusive stepfather

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Why was the lady afraid of cooking? Because her husband always beat her with a frying pan

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An American and Russian are arguing about their country. The American says "I can do things you can't. I can walk into the White House and into the Oval Office. I can bang my hands on my President's desk and say "Mr. Obama, I don't like the way you're running your country." The Russian says, "I can do that." The American says, "No, you can't." The Russian says, "Sure I can. I can go to Vladimir Putin's office and say "Mr. President, I don't like the way Mr. Obama's running his country."

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Roses are red, Viiolets are blue, Get in the gas chamber, You dirty Jew.

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"Whooaaa Momma." - Says Johnny Bravo

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what did the downsindrome get for christmas?? A: Aids and a Dead wife

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If I had a nickel for every time I heard that... I'd most likely have no money as I would spend it all on cocaine.

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What happened to the guy that took to many lunesta pills? He fell asleep but he was glad it was the weekend or he would have been late for his job

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New groundbreaking research has just revealed today that a complex sentence can be used to manipulate the human mind, so in this sentence somewhere is a psychological amemphism that subconsciously hypnotises the mind into doing something within the next five seconds, and if you read this sentence over and over again, you might just spot it!

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What's worse than getting struck by lightning? Getting struck while your in your house!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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