FORTY SECONDS!!!!!!

What is the difference between a person with Alzheimer's and Aids? 24!

Q: Why did the little girl fall off the swing? A: She didn't have any arms.

A man buys a prius

Why do ducks have flat feet? To stomp out forest fires Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out flaming ducks

knock knock whos there i dont know. go look

your mom is so ugly when she entered an ugly contest they said... ok

Simon walks into a bar. He orders his favorite beer. The bartender says "Hey Simon, I see you're back with the usual, aye?" Simon says "Touch you tongue to your elbow." The bartender couldn't do it.

sure!

Many people believe that dogs are mammals. They're right

What's worse than knowing you have Hepititis C? Not knowing.

Call jets pizza at 8637090999 and say porr cisero is still stuck and shit will go down

Q. who's george porchy?

Why is my son so unhappy? Because I beat his mother violently in front of him

Justin Bieber

What's black and white and red all over? A nun that was stabbed to death.

REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REDD REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED................................that is all LOL

A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. It started raining and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

I'm on a seafood diet. It consists of prawns and tuna.

A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender looks down at him and says "Hey, we have a drink named after you." the grasshopper looks up at the bartender...then proceeds to hop along because Grasshoppers can't communicate with humans. Then several of the bars patrons looked at the bartender, worried for his mental health.

How much dub could a dubstep dub if a dubstep could step dub?

nice tits.

What did Stephen Hawking say to the prostitute? A several garbled and mostly inaudible comment that she could not understand.

Why did David go swimming? Pink sock.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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