How do you make a baby stop crying?you scream at it and throw it at wall

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There was a big guy he was called Mac. So Mc Donalds turned him into a burger

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Do you want to hear a good anti-joke? Well I don't have one.

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A jellyfish walks into a bar, the bar doesnt appreciate him, so he retreats back to his jellyfish lands.

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What do you get when you cross a 747 with a passenger train? A large colission with hundreds dead and injured.

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A: What did the Orange say to the Mango? B: Sup Hommie?! A: Wtf.... (awkwardly walks away)

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What do you call a 5000 pound gorilla? Obese - gorillas should weigh around 400 pounds.

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how are a ferrari and a pile of dead babies similar? neither are good to have in your garage when the police come.

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Q: Why can't a tomato fly a plane? A: Cuz it's a tomato

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I need a side cart on my motorcycle just for my diick

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Yeah, Eliza, its me, its so strange, you are the only one I remember from highschool, I was worried you had forgotten about me, anyway, yeah type as if you where speaking to him, and dont worry, I know I could not keep a secret back then, and I told Nero, so and he promised me he would kindly break my fingers if I told anyone, besides I dont do that anymore trust me.

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How can you tell if a dog is under your chair? Look under your chair

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How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

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What do you call a bathtub full of dead babies? A tradegy.

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Why was the man in the kitchen? Because his wife was raped and killed.

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My dog got out of its cage So I found it and beat the shit out of my neighbors kid.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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Hi

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What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

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Why did the priest kill his family? Preists can't marry, therefore have not families.

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Q; What feels like plastic and tastes fake? A: School Food

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Why was 10 afraid of 9? Because 9-8-7-6-5-4-3-2-1...Kaboom!

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Why did the catfish cross the road? Catfish can't walk.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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