Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, monkey do. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

What do a black man and an elephant have in common? They are both multi-cellular organisms, they both belong to the kingdom Animalia, the phylum Chordata, and the class Mammalia, they both possess vertebrae, they both move through legged locomotion, they both possess knee joints and they both possess the capacity for altruistic behavior.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To pick up the carcass of its road-killed younger brother and weep.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? "Get in the Batmobile"

What did the prostitute get for Christmas Money

You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon

What do you call a black man that cuts people up and takes their money? A surgeon.

Why did the chicken cross the road ? To achieve his goal on the other side of the road. Being a chicken he is not aware of the arm a fast traveling motor vehicle can bring to him.

I just flew here from Cleveland, and boy are my arms tired! The people on either side of me were hogging the armrests, so I had to kind of tuck my arms up behind my head and it was very uncomfortable.

roses are red so are the jews every one loved that holocaust news

Three Greeks and Three Turks are traveling by train to a conference. Both racial groups arrive safely to their destination.

What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari? A Ferrari was never alive.

A guy walks into a restaurant. "What would you like?" says the waiter. "A glass of orange juice," replies the man.

whats worse than finding a worm in apple? being chased by retards

A Cheerio is at Cheerio high school, and there is another Cheerio that he wants to ask to the prom, but she is a frosted Cheerio and because of Cheerio social statuses she would not go with him. So he goes to the Cheerio factory so he can become a frosted Cheerio. The factory workers tell him that he can be a frosted Cheerio, but the machines are malfunctioning today and they can only frost half of him. He agrees, and the girl Cheerio goes to the prom with him. He shows up at the prom with her, and she asks him to get her some punch. So, he's walking around, looking for the punch line, when he realizes: There isn't any.

How do you say a bad word in your language? Like this: "A bad word in your language"

A black man approaches a customer service desk and asks for help. He is racially discriminated and receives no help with his problem.

Q:What do you call an insecure person A:Somebody who is likely to commit suicide

how do you fit 100 jews in a mini ? two in the front, two in theback and 96 in the ash tray

what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? when people don't understand the concept of anti-jokes and post real jokes

What do you call a rollercoaster without a coaster? A roller

why was the kid crying his dad is a alchoholic

Q:Why is the WMBA so unsuccessful? A:Barely anyone watches it

why did the man turn on and off the lights 20 times because he was diagnosed with O.C.D as a child

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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