What did the Mexican say when a house fell on him? Nothing. He's dead.

Where's my tractor?

In a tangential universe Crispin Glover is the head of scientology

what types of people have big noses? people whose parents both carried the recesive gene.

Q; What's the new slogan for the TSA? We handle more junk than EBay.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill all his friends and family.

Roses are red Violets are blue There's nothing else I want to say

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cancer

A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

What did the black man say about Linkin Park? That there's obviously a rapist in their midst and they should all be questioned.

Chuck Norris walks into a bar, and asks for directions to the nearest Applebee's.

Why couldn't Sally climb up the ladder? Because she was a paraplegic.

What did the orange say to the lemon? "Hello"

Roses are red Violets are blue You just lost the game UMAD Bro?

what is worse than tripping over a tree root? getting mauled by a 60 foot bear

Barack Obama.

An old couple walks up to me and says, "can you take our picture? It's our 50th anniversary." I reply, "sure." Then I pull the man to the side and ask, "how do you make a relationship last so long? I can't make one last 50 days let alone years." He leans in and says, "cheat"

How do you know you're crazy? Consult the pink pheasent to your left

XD, I know I noticed myself, I was like "why the fuck did I post that shit?" Rellez XD okay sistah, I think I am just gonna get some sleep now, but Nero, is not Justin Bibble the first one?

how can u tell if you have cancer if the doctor says so

What's the difference between and orange? The horse wasn't wearing a saddle.

Why didnt suzy give mary i high five? because i cut off her hand

Why don't midgets live in penthouses? They can't reach the button in the elevator.

Stranger at door: *Knock knock* Oliver Twist: Who's there? Stranger at door: Not your parents.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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