shammmm is a lesbian.

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What did the blind deaf kid get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Bear walks into bar and says to eagle may I have a................... drink eagle says why the long pause hohahahohahahohaha

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a pile of shit. I don't have a pile of shit in my garage.

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What do you call a black scuba diver... A scuba diver.

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Why did the baker turn off the oven? He had run out of business

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What's black, white and red all over? Half a penguin.

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. An impossible thing because he can't walk.

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Rebecca Black. That's it. That's the joke.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Well you should really try some.

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Why did the chicken cross the street? He wanted to make breakfast

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Where did Mary go when the bomb blew up? Everywhere.

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How do you get a bunch of Jews in a car? You tell this family who happens to be of Jewish faith that they are going to be late for the birth of another family member's child. How do you get them out? Tell the mother had a miscarriage. This will make them promptly want to leave the care and grieve with the other family members for the lost child.

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What did Britney Spears say when she got to Paris? "Oh my God, we're in France!"

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At a feminist picnic there are no sandwiches.

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A large commercial airliner is piloted toward inner-city New York. The plane is driven into the World Trade Center by a terrorist. The United States will now issue a holiday to mourn all we have lost in this tragic event.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar, because they have turned to alcoholism because there is no God. GO COMMUNISM, BOO AMERICA.

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A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

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What happened to the kid who couldn't swim? He drowned.

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Jimmy said he would never beat his wife, so why did he do it anyway? Because he was a hypocrite.

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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Justin Bieber

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Say silk 5 times. Silk Silk Silk Silk Silk Now what do cows drink? Water.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops