What do a black man and an elephant have in common? They are both multi-cellular organisms, they both belong to the kingdom Animalia, the phylum Chordata, and the class Mammalia, they both possess vertebrae, they both move through legged locomotion, they both possess knee joints and they both possess the capacity for altruistic behavior.

Did you hear about the man who played the lottery? He lost.

Why doesn't the South Pole war veteran remember the name of his child? He is a penguin and could care less about naming his children. Why doesn't the penguin on the North Pole remember the name of his child? There are no penguins on the North Pole.

Q: There is an Elf King, King Kong, and Godzilla all on the empire state building. Which one jumps first? A: None, because none of them exist.

What colour is a black man in a freezer black

What did the baby say to it's mother as it was being thrown in the trash bin? Nothing, it couldn't talk yet.

An Anthony eats a juicy pickle.

Why did Ant Man die? He was shot by a gangster, duh.

What has straight black lines and is square? A refferee.

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE HERE'S A KNIFE KILL YOURSELF KANE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A skeleton walks into a bar and the bartender says why the long face? the skeleton replies I have aids.

Roses are red Violents are blue Oranges

rosie o'donald goes on a diet

If a bunch of midgets do the wave, is it a ripple ?

what did the white guy say to the black guy at the homeless shelter? Hi.

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? That would depend on the individual situation at hand and to assume you could accurately estimate that is ridiculous.

Roses are red, my name is not Dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave.

Knock Knock ************************** No-one's home

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the poll booth to vote on a law restricting the questioning of chickens destination and furthermore to let chickens cross with out ridicule.

Three jews walk into a bar. The bar is hosting a bar mitzvah.

Can you get me a stapler,but make sure it has staples or else I won't be able to staple anything

Roses are Purple Chickens are gray I'm color blind You have cancer I'll see you in hell Ba bye now

What's worse than watching 5 homeless men have an orgy? Waking up and having to clean the sheets

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have a fetish for sniffing your shoes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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