What do a carrot and a kangaroo have in common? Nothing...

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Roses are blue Violets are too I've got Alzheimer Roses are red

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A have a black guy in my family tree. He married my cousin a few years back

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being cut in half by a human while you were trying to eat an apple

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A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear turns to the rabbit and says "I have colon cancer."

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What did the man get from killing his own wife and children? A boner.

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Q; What's the new slogan for the TSA? We handle more junk than EBay.

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Why was Rodney afraid of Chung Lee? Because Chung Lee is an intimidating person, capable of literally ripping your face off.

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A Jewish man with a 20 mile boner walks into a wall. Which body part hits the wall first? His nose

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so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

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A horse walks into a bar. bar tender: "Why the long face" *bu dum tss" horse: "My wife died of terminal cancer."

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I used to tell people: step on my foot on purpose and ill FUCKlNG BREAK YOURS! Then I Evolved.. friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: Thumb me down or step on my foot if only on mistake, and I will break off both your legs and ram them up your ASS!

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Q: Why didn't the blonde answer the call from her boyfriend? A: She had died in a rollover the day before.

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What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

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Nicki Minaj walks into a bar... there's no punchline because ruining music isn't funny.

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What do you get when you cross a surfer and a black man? An angry surfer and an angry black man. You really should be nicer to people.

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Your momma is so stupid, because she didn't get a proper education

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what is the difference between the black orphan and the white orphan.... the black orphan died after i raped it

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A Brick

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why did the grandmom make rollerblades into cookies? because she had dementia

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Q: Why is Alzheimer not funny? A: To get to the other side.

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I have never liked jokes. They promote laughter, which is the music of Satan strangling hairy children and wildebeast. I'd like to thank anti-joke.com for their work in the struggle against hilarity.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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Religion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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