Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

what did the boy get after his first communion? unwanted intercourse with his priest that resulted in scaring him for life, until the day he killed himself because he could never get over it.

Why did the muslim cross the road? To blow up a train

What's worse than falling off a horse? Falling off a cliff.

Knock Knock Who’s there? Wolf Wolf who? Wolf who!? Is that really the first question that comes to mind when confronted with a talking wolf?

Roses are red Violets are blue Poetry is hard And so is wood

I have this friend named Rachel, so I call her Rachel.

Misner is a twat.

Why didn't the man get to see his family on Christmas? He was blind.

What do you call a skeleton in your closet? Evidence of a brutal crime. You should probably call the cops.

How do you confuse a blonde? take the albuterol

Your momma's so fat that she should really be concerned for her health and seek professional help to manage her weight.

A 21 year old man walks into a bar. After looking at the menu for a minute he orders the cocktail of the day. The bartender looks at the man in disbelief because he has such a baby face and looks like a teenage kid. The bartender politely asks to see his ID. The man pulls out his wallet and shows him his drivers license. Sure enough he was the legal age of drinking. The bartender says "Thank you" and gives him his beverage.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Being unaware of his surroundings, the chicken was startled by an oncoming motor vehicle. Due to the animals vapid logic an reasoning, based on impulse it quickly ran to the other side of the street to avoid its imminent death by the speeding automobile. Unknowingly, the chicken had reached the other side of the road,

What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? Dance Dance Revolution

That day where Captain America becomes too weak and frail to hold his own shield.

THE GAME.

what do you call two arabs flying a plane? a pilot and a co-pilot

Ebola

Hi rebecca , its me that guy over there. purple moneky blue dishwasher. aka JUMANJIIII

John, Where are you John: Here! Where's here? John: nevermind

Q. What did the black lawyer say to the rabbi? A. We're both highly educated professionals.

What do you call the offspring of a gerbil and a hamster? Whatever you want.

So your driving your brick car and the steering wheel falls off. So how many pancakes does it take to fill your dog house? 12 because hamsters don't wear shoes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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